For Writers

 

You want to be an author you say?

Well, there’s no blueprint for it.

Some writers are good. Some are not so good. Some make us mad. Some make us smile. Some are incredibly gorgeous, skinny and well spoken and make you hate them for having brains, looks and creativity and some prefer to stay behind the keyboard at all times in their flannel pajamas and instant coffee.

Many writers adopt the personas of their characters, so it is very likely you won’t know who they are from one day to the next. This is all very normal.

I could charge you a fee for a downloadable step-by-step program that would tell you exactly what to do to be the next Steven King, but unfortunately it doesn’t exist.

But, being a writer with a sometimes know-it-all attitude (based on OPO, not mine) I say that there are some pretty shnazzy things you CAN do to get published.

There are books you can buy that actually give stellar advice for this road you have chosen to take. You can check out my faves page for some of those.

It wasn’t until I had my world rocked that I knew I could be any good at writing.

So, here’s what I’m hoping. I’m hoping you have some ridiculously sad, funny, obnoxious, terrifying, tragic or humiliating experiences in your life because people want to read it. And hey, sometimes it’s tragically funny, sad, humiliating, obnoxious, and terrifying to just fall in front of others – it’s actually story worthy.

If you are a nerd, a beauty queen, a stay-at-home mom, a workaholic mom, an alcoholic mom, a raging sex addict, a man addicted to petri dishes and microscopes or even professional at making bad investments – you have a story that someone needs to hear. It is my solid belief that acquiring such…. um qualities (or peculiarities) can go very far in the life span of a writer.

You may or may have been:

 

  • The kid who had to wear a head gear five hours daily while withstanding the intro to puberty.
  • The stag kid at every school dance, waiting for your carpool to pick you up so you can go home, eat cheese crunchies and watch Sixteen Candles.
  • The “dweeb” with intrinsic knowledge on beetles (the insect, not the band).
  • Never even a bridesmaid, let alone a bride.
  • Always on the outside and never with the in crowd.
  • Home alone on weekends, dateless on New Years Eve, MIA on Valentine’s Day.
  • The begrudged assistant to some high profile fashion editor, actor or purse designer.
  • The kid with the ‘affluent’ family he never saw, but lived in their really nice house.
  • The girl who ‘oops’ did it again.
  • The scapegoat.
  • The crazy one.
  • The innocent finally gone wild.

 

It will make them turn the page because in one way or another you were born with the innate ability to observe life in it’s simplicity or complexity. You probably notice more of your surroundings than anyone you know. You’re probably still trying to figure this whole thing out. Whether you grew up in a dysfunctional or highly healthy functional family – you aren’t normal. No one really is. If you are normal, you are weird. If you are weird – well, you’re still just weird. You’ve probably had your heartbroken, lost all your money at one time, or felt supremely insecure because of your skin, your age, your weight, your hair or lack of. If you have felt none of these, then you have reason to write a story. Who are you and where did you come from? No, really….

Now, there are all different types of writers and some will, yes, require a degree and substantial experience in the field you are writing in. But, the main requirement to write anything is to write what you know. It doesn’t really matter how you found out – if you know a lot about something, there is probably something pretty impacting that happened and that’s why you are interested in it. The experience is the important part.

So, I don’t have a top ten list of requirements that I suggest in order to become a writer. I think everyone has a book in them. It’s just a fact. You don’t have to be a writer to have a book or a story. But, I will say this – the more you read and the more you do write – the better a writer you will become.

That’s all I got.